On medical leave

I get nothing done while on medical leave.

I get up late and check Jacob’s schedule. He’s been working while I sleep.

I review his vocabulary with him.

I lie down and read a book for next year’s curriculum.

I go over Jacob’s Health assignment. We review together for his test. I log in to check my email on my work account. I don’t want to see the backlog of writing that my coworkers must now do for me. I log out.

I lie down, my heart aching in my chest.

I read some Biology and explain phenotypes and genotypes while lying on the couch.

I keep reading my book. My hands are cold. The sky is cloudy and temperatures are way, way below the normal for May. I am discouraged. My lupus is no better than when I first went out on medical leave.

I get up and go over the Global History and write the schedule for the next week.

I lie down. I check personal email from my laptop while reclined.

I get up and look at my garden. I pull up a dandelion. I feel the chest pains again.

I lie down. The house needs cleaning. The garden needs work. This quarter’s grades haven’t yet been sent in to the school district.

I get nothing down while on medical leave.